Self-approval refers to an individual's unconditional affirmation, acceptance, and love of their own existential value and validity, serving as the cornerstone of physical and mental health.
1965-1966 · The Early Sessions: Book 5 of The Seth MaterialAI summary (single book)
In The Early Sessions Book 5, through an in-depth analysis of the psychology of a specific individual and the dynamics of intimate relationships, Seth concretely explains the operating mechanism of the concept of "self-approval" and its profound influence on psychic health and interpersonal relationships.
I. The core formulation of self-approval: the inner establishment of self-worth
Seth points out that self-approval is closely connected with an individual's sense of certainty about their own merit. In the case described in the text, when a person "is not certain of her own merit," she cannot generate unconditional self-acceptance from within, but instead must "obtain self-approval through the approval, support, or auspices of others" . This practice of outsourcing the source of self-approval to external objects reveals the compensatory psychological mechanism that operates when the foundation of a healthy psyche is lacking.
II. Distinctive aspects of the lack of self-approval in intimate relationships
Inability to be a true partner: Seth emphasizes that a person who cannot independently obtain self-approval "is not a partner" in a relationship, and this leads intimate relationships into real difficulty . A true partnership must be built on both parties possessing independent self-approval and a sense of self-worth.
The erosion of self-worth by anger: In interaction, a partner's anger produces highly destructive consequences. Anger not only fails to help the other person build a self, but actually "lowers her importance in her own eyes, and therefore also lowers her importance in your eyes" . This double devaluation further destroys the possibility of establishing self-approval.
The deep fear of "not being needed": An individual lacking self-approval is filled with insecurity deep within. She will fear that her partner is more efficient than she is in managing the household, and her fundamental fear is that "the other person does not need her" . Because she cannot be certain of her own inner worth, she can only confirm her existence through being needed.
III. Defense mechanisms and behavioral manifestations of the lack of self-approval
Resistance to serious communication: A person lacking self-approval feels severely threatened when facing serious dialogue, because she "fears the unknown" . When facing serious discussion, she produces a regressive reaction, "feeling like a child facing parents who say 'now we must talk seriously'" . Such discussion threatens her fragile status quo, so she prefers to obtain comfort and reassurance through trivial conversation .
Subconscious desire for control: Although she fears communicating through intellectual or serious means, because she lacks inner self-approval, she is subconsciously "compelled to dominate and lead" her partner, even attempting to seize control through feminine gentle means or emotional methods, in order to compensate for her lack of security .
IV. The destruction of self-approval by the family of origin
Seth further points out that this lack of self-approval often has deep family roots. In the case, the individual's father damaged her psychological health even more than her mother, because the father conveyed to her the image that "males are weak" . This caused her, when facing a strong male, to regard him both as a threat and as a guarantee of safety; this inner split greatly hindered her from establishing healthy self-approval .
Summary
At this stage of The Early Sessions Book 5, Seth's discussion of "self-approval" is highly practical and relationship-oriented. Unlike later discussions that may approach self-acceptance more from the perspective of metaphysics or beliefs creating reality, the wording and argumentation here focus entirely on the micro-level of interpersonal interaction, childhood trauma, and emotional communication. Seth clearly points out that to save a relationship trapped by this lack of self-approval, one must stop using anger that devalues the other person's worth, and through establishing a nonviolent "emotional bridge" make the other person aware of their importance, thereby assisting them in rebuilding inner self-approval .
1972-1973 · The Nature of Personal RealityAI summary (single book)
In The Nature of Personal Reality, the concept of 'self-approval' is expounded mainly through 'Affirmation' and through love and acceptance of the self. The following is the core formulation, distinctive aspects, and wording analysis of this concept. I. Core definition and multidimensional expression of self-approval.
Unconditional affirmation of existence: 'Affirmation' means saying 'yes' to your own being and to the life you lead, and accepting your unique individuality . It is a psychic and physical necessity and represents an appreciation of your own extraordinary integrity .
Accepting physical reality: Affirmation means tacitly accepting your reality as a spirit made flesh, and accepting your own miraculous complexity .
Genuine self-pride: Seth defines 'genuine self-pride' as a loving recognition of one's own integrity and worth; it is the basis of true humility . II. Distinctive aspects and cognitive reshaping.
Rejecting the trap of 'perfection': Seth points out that 'perfection' presupposes a state incapable of change and incapable of further growth . Self-approval requires us to accept imperfection and to regard it as a groping toward a more complete 'becoming' .
Accepting the flow of emotions: You cannot love yourself and at the same time hate the feelings that flow through you. Hating your own emotions is, in essence, hating yourself .
Refusing to compare yourself with others: Within your own uniqueness, comparing yourself with others is futile, for it denies your own miraculous existence and viewpoint . Acknowledging your own uniqueness enables you to trust your present circumstances , and to encourage others openly, without envy or shrinking back .
Distinguishing belief from fact: It is necessary to recognize that 'believing you are worthless' is different from 'actually being worthless' . Taking your basic worth for granted as a matter of course allows you not to feel threatened when facing shortcomings . III. Fine-tuning of conceptual wording and translation comparison. In this book, the expression of self-approval has a careful correspondence in the English and Chinese editions: the English 'Affirmation' is rendered in Chinese as 'affirmation' ; the English 'loving regard for yourself' is rendered as 'a loving respect for yourself' ; the English phrase about affirming one's 'lightness' or 'validity and grace' in the universe is rendered in the Chinese edition as affirming one's rightfulness , emphasizing unconditional acceptance of the value of one's own existence. In addition, acceptance of one's own soundness in the present can alter the past and the future across time .
1975-1977 · The Nature of the Psyche: Its Human ExpressionAI summary (single book)
In The Nature of the Psyche, regarding the concept of "self-approval" (that is, the individual's unconditional affirmation, acceptance, and love of their own existential value and rightness), although the specific term is not directly used in the given text, its core meaning is profoundly expressed through discussions of "love," "biological and psychological integrity," "consciousness of one's own entity," and "value fulfillment." The following is a summary of the relevant discussions of this concept in the book:
I. Love and creativity as the biological and psychic driving force of self-existence and manifestation
The book points out that love is a biological as well as a psychic characteristic, and it is basically synonymous with "creativity." Love does not depend on a specific object to exist; it is itself a driving force through which all existence is manifested. The individual's desires, love, intents, beliefs, and purposes together form the experience of the body and all perceived events. This view of "love" as the fundamental driving force of life provides dual biological and psychological legitimacy for the "unconditional love and acceptance" in self-approval .
II. The inseparability of thought and body as the healthy cornerstone of biological and psychological integrity
Self-approval as the cornerstone of physical and mental health is concretely expressed in the book as the constant mutual give-and-take between "biological and psychological integrity." The book emphasizes that there is actually no distinction between thought and body; thoughts are as active and natural as cells, and are equally intended to ensure the survival and growth of the individual. Therefore, the individual cannot change bodily experience without changing beliefs. When the body has health difficulties, one cannot separate the wisdom of the body from thought. By treating the manipulation of consciousness as a creative, vibrant game, the individual can rediscover "truly transparent exuberance," thereby achieving full affirmation and acceptance of the self on both psychological and biological levels .
III. Consciousness of one's own entity and the inner impetus of "value fulfillment"
On both micro and macro levels, the essence of self-approval is traced back to the awareness of all things of their own entity. The book mentions that even atoms and molecules possess a kind of "consciousness of their own entity"; they are aware of their own separation and are born with the impetus of "value fulfillment." This awareness and pursuit of one's own unique existential value is an innate characteristic of all things in the universe. Every part of the universe is conscious, and the creativity and the planner exist within the plan itself. This universal consciousness of entity and the impetus of value fulfillment fundamentally grant every individual the unconditional affirmation of existential value and rightness .
Summary and distinctive aspects
In the discussion of this period, the distinctive aspect of this concept lies in closely combining the psychological "self-approval" with biological mechanisms, cellular vitality, and the "consciousness of entity" and "value fulfillment" of microscopic particles in the universe. It shows that self-affirmation and acceptance are not only a psychological attitude, but also an instinct of biological survival and a natural extension of cosmic creativity.
Mike's commentary (Chinese)Mike's commentary
The Way Toward Health · Chapter 32 related passages in this chapter
"Self-approval" is a core cornerstone in Seth's philosophy regarding individual value, psychic health, and the creation of reality. It refers to an individual's unconditional affirmation, acceptance, and love of their own existence, unique individuality, and life force . Self-approval is not an acquired moral achievement, but an innate nature and right of all life . It requires the individual to say "yes" to their own being , to acknowledge their own miraculous complexity as a "spirit become flesh" , and to trust their own basic value and integrity .
2. Primary Expositions
(1) The Dynamics of Inner Establishment and External Compensation
On the level of individual psychology and interpersonal relationships, self-approval is closely linked to an individual's sense of certainty regarding their own merit. When a person is unsure of their own merit, they cannot generate unconditional self-acceptance from within, but must instead obtain self-approval through the approval, support, or auspices of others . This practice of outsourcing the source of self-approval to external objects leads to genuine difficulties in intimate relationships, preventing the individual from being a true partner . An individual lacking self-approval is filled with deep-seated insecurity and fears "not being wanted" . When faced with serious communication, they may react regressively out of fear of the unknown, feeling like a child facing a parent ; in the subconscious, they may even attempt to dominate and direct the partner through emotional means to compensate for their own lack of security . The partner's anger, in turn, can have destructive consequences, lowering their sense of self-worth and destroying the possibility of establishing self-approval .
(2) Cognitive Reshaping and the Multidimensional Aspects of Self-Acceptance
True self-approval requires individuals to break through many cognitive misconceptions:
Discarding the trap of "perfection": "Perfection" presupposes a state that cannot change and cannot continue to grow . Self-approval requires us to accept imperfection and view it as a groping toward a more complete "becoming" .
Accepting the flow of emotions: You cannot love yourself and at the same time hate the emotions that flow through you. To hate your own emotions is, in essence, to hate yourself .
Refusing to compare oneself with others: Comparing oneself with others within one's own individuality is futile; it denies one's own miraculous existence and vision . Acknowledging one's own individuality allows one to trust the present situation and cheerfully encourage others .
Distinguishing beliefs from facts: One must realize that "believing oneself to be without value" is different from "actually being without value" . Taking one's basic value for granted allows one to face shortcomings without feeling threatened .
(3) The Validity of Existence Without Need for Justification and Natural Belonging
Self-approval means affirming the validity and grace of one's own existence . When an individual trusts their basic integrity as a person, they can clearly and objectively assess their own abilities, neither exaggerating nor underestimating them . You will no longer feel the need to "justify your existence" by exaggerating a certain talent or setting up rigid ideals . Instead, by accepting the rightness of your life in the universe, your ideals will align with your own nature . Furthermore, self-approval is reflected in trusting the body's self-healing capacity. By feeling a sense of belonging with nature and releasing blocking beliefs about bodily weakness or humanity's killer instincts, an individual can truly dare to exercise their abilities .
(4) The Universal Dimensions of Microscopic Matter and Vital Spontaneity
On a grander scale, self-approval is an innate nature of all life. All living creatures are born with a keen sense of self-approval, naturally taking pride in themselves and loving themselves . This self-approval is also experienced in different ways by atoms, molecules, and all hierarchies of physical matter . For example, the atoms and molecules that make up an iron nail possess their own lively consciousness and perform highly symmetrical and rhythmic dances within themselves . The value fulfillment of every element in life relies on those spontaneous processes (such as the body's self-repair, breathing, etc.) , and the source of these spontaneous processes is precisely the basic affirmative love and acceptance of oneself, the universe, and the life situation .
3. Evolutionary Context
Seth's exposition of "self-approval" presents a clear progression from "microscopic interpersonal dynamics" to a "grand metaphysics of life," yet its core principles remain highly consistent throughout.
During the stage of The Early Sessions, Volume 5 (1965–1966), Seth's discourse was highly focused on the microscopic levels of interpersonal interaction, childhood trauma, and emotional communication. At this point, self-approval was concretized as the establishment of self-worth in intimate relationships, focusing on analyzing how a lack of self-approval leads to a desire for control, regressive reactions, and the fear of "not being wanted," while emphasizing the use of non-violent emotional bridges to assist in rebuilding self-approval .
In The Nature of Personal Reality (1972–1973), Seth elevated this concept to the philosophical height of beliefs creating reality, introducing the core term "affirmation," emphasizing the unconditional acceptance of one's own existence, the acceptance of the flow of emotions, and trust in individuality, and pointing out that the acceptance of one's own soundness in the present can alter the past and future across time .
In The Individual and the Nature of Mass Events (1977–1979), Seth further connected self-approval with the "validity of existence" and "inner impulses," pointing out that trusting impulses is trusting the nature of life, with no need to justify one's existence .
Finally, in the late work The Way to Health (1984), Seth endowed self-approval with extremely grand significance in life mechanics and microscopic physics. It is not only the instinct of newborn creatures but also the conscious foundation of microscopic particles (atoms, molecules), and he closely integrated it with the "spontaneity" of life and the "surrender and acceptance" of the life force, viewing it as the decisive starting point for achieving physical and mental healing and health .
4. Relationships with Related Concepts
Relationship with "Affirmation": Affirmation is the concrete practice of self-approval. Affirmation means saying "yes" to your own being, accepting your unique individuality and physical reality . It is the active expression of self-approval at the level of consciousness.
Relationship with "Loving Yourself": Loving yourself is the cornerstone and natural result of self-approval. Seth emphasizes that "you cannot love your neighbor unless you love yourself first" . Loving yourself means having a loving regard for yourself, which is the prerequisite for establishing true interpersonal relationships and a psychic atmosphere .
Relationship with "Impulses": Impulses are the bridge of communication between the inner ego and waking consciousness, originating from the "impulse to be" . Self-approval inevitably requires an individual to trust their own impulses; to distrust impulses is, in essence, to distrust one's own life and the nature of the universe .
Relationship with "Spontaneity" and "Abandon": Spontaneity is the path to the value fulfillment of life, while abandon is the complete opening and trust toward one's own life force . Self-approval manifests through trusting spontaneity, and ultimately achieves physical and mental health and healing through the surrender and acceptance of the life force .
5. Representative Original Quotations
"Unsure of your own merit... you must look for self-approval under the auspices of another." — The Early Sessions, Volume 5
"Affirmation means saying 'yes' to yourself and to the life you lead, and accepting your unique individuality... It is a spiritual and physical necessity." — The Nature of Personal Reality
"You cannot love your neighbor unless you love yourself first." — The Individual and the Nature of Mass Events
"All creatures are born with a keen sense of self-approval. Each creature at its birth naturally takes pride in itself, and loves itself." — The Way to Health
"The first step toward spiritual, physical, emotional, and mental health is indeed the surrender to, the acceptance of, and the affirmation of your own life force." — The Way to Health